So I have been thinking. (Yes, yes dangerous I know!)
What have I been thinking about? You might wonder. I have been thinking about how to get healthcare reform legislation passed in this country. No big deal, really.
Obviously, if you have been paying attention to the news you know that the main problem is a very loud, very conservative minority. Turns out all the rational people gave up caveman-like behaviors somewhere around the time the species started walking upright, but a few stragglers have held on through interbreeding with the drunk and stupid to create a hybrid race of humanoids now commonly referred today as the “Republican Right-Wing”
Since we can’t kill em, and we can’t keep them from procreating I suggest using our higher intelligence to trick them into supporting healthcare. How can this be done? The answer lies in the observation of the group itself. Ask yourself this, what do Republicans like more than guns and abstinence education? (Barring celibacy enforced by guns, of course) the answer is Jesus (isn’t it always?)
We are fooling ourselves if we think that religion does not enforce public policy on a daily basis in this country, but where as “Conservative Christians” see it as an ends, I advocate it as a means to an end, a tool, used by logic and strategy to achieve a goal for the betterment of our country. Lets put that well-ingrained Puritan guilt to good use people!
So here is what I propose. Why not depolarize the issue by tying healthcare to Christian morals? That whole “Love thy neighbor” thing sounds catchy.
Or how about
Jesus ❤ healthy living. Support a public option.
It may not be the most sophisticated strategy, the most ethical, or even constitutionally viable, but sometimes you just have to fight fire with fire. Hellfire, that is.